Tag: chonic fatigue

christian, Health Journey

It’s Been a Crazy Week!!!

Teresa Love

God is good!!!

Life has been a whirlwind lately. As my boyfriend Rick and I have been getting to know each other and learning everything about each other. We discovered that even at a early time of dating we loved each other. And now fast forward 9 months! We are planning to find a place to live and get married.

This is not a love letter to my boyfriend. It’s a “wow I can’t believe this is my life right now!?”

7 years of being sick 4 of them being close to housebound and now I am in the process of finding a place to live away from my parents, I have a boyfriend who truly cares about me, and we are planning a wedding in the future. Like serious what is my life!?

Story time: months and months ago Ricky and I put our name on a waiting list for these apartments that weren’t even built yet. The wonderful this is they are literally 1 minute from my house now. This means with my health my mom can help me anytime I need, if he’s not home and I’m having a bad health day or symptom. We really wanted to stay in our same town as close as we could to my parents. Then on Thursday July 30th they contacted us. Asking if we wanted to come in for a tour? Of course we said “yes!” Scheduled it for July 10th which was in 2 Saturdays. I understood I needed to wait but I was starting to worry a little. Then Saturday morning they texted and said “you can come at 11:30am for a tour.” Of course we said “yes!”

We went for the tour. At first it seemed odd cause it was still a construction site and we knocked and no one answered. It was daylight so we weren’t worried and I have my big tough guy with me. Lol

So I called the number they texted me and they said “oh awesome, we are here we will walk down from the model home section.” We met 2 really nice ladies. They right away showed us the clubhouse which had a heated pool, pool table, high ceilings, tables and high seats, etc. it looked awesome!

Then they took us in the golf cart to the one apartment that is actually finished. It was absolutely beautiful. Loved everything. It didn’t feel too small which can be a big problem for me cause I get claustrophobic. I could totally picture us living there. There was a nice kitchen with all appliances. There was windows that brought in a lot of light. And a walk in closet which could be a nice way to hide some stuff (makeup drawers, book cart, bathroom cart, clothes, etc) and a bath/shower in the bathroom nothing was too short which can be a problem with our tall heights. Is was gorgeous and very home like.

There’s a little more process to do but we are looking at our expenses and planning to jump on the application when we get all our ducks in a row and they contact us again.

Then we decided to go look at rings. I knew I wanted to look and he didn’t know even my size so we went on a little trip to go ring shopping. First we went to the place he got my necklace which was for Valentine’s Day ended up finding the ABSOLUTE perfect dream ring there it’s unique just like I am as he said. So now we are starting the process to plan the wedding because the ring will take 2-4 weeks for it to come in since it’s custom. Exciting!!!!!!

Im just really happy, excited, joyful, and content. I still have my ups and downs with my health. Even a newish thing if I think too much or do too much for too long then I get a pretty bad migraine (so that’s fun…not)

But seriously I am feeling so blessed!!

For now. Please pray and send us good thoughts. We need to stay calm, relaxed, and excited. When God opens door we chose to walk through.

Love, T

Health Journey

Recovery

Teresa Love

“If you stumble, make it part of the dance.” –  Unknown

“She made broken look beautiful and strong look invincible. She walked with the universe on her shoulders and made it look like a pair of wings.” –  Ariana Dancu

“I don’t want my pain and struggle to make me a victim. I want my battle to make me someone else’s hero.” –  Unknown

“Resting is not laziness, it’s medicine!”

“When the unthinkable happens, the lighthouse is hope. Once we choose hope, everything is possible.” –  Christopher Reeve

“If opening your eyes, or getting out of bed, or holding a spoon, or combing your hair is the daunting Mount Everest you climb today, that is okay.” –  Carmen Ambrosio

Recovery its not an ugly word. It is the word that “means a return to a normal state of health, mind, or strength.” or “he action or process of regaining possession or control of something stolen or lost.”

This word recovery is often used when someone is recovering from something whether it’s an addiction or a short health related thing. But what do you do when your health condition has effected every single aspect of your life? You can’t think or walk without it saying, “I’m here.”

My life has been been just like this. But we aren’t here to say “poor me,” because in my opinion saying those words doesn’t help you live the best life that I believe we deserve.

So about 6 months ago, I made the decision to get the covid 19 Pfizer shot. After having a really weird body and knowing I could have the rare reactions, I took a leap of faith and got it. We won’t talk about how long I waited in a car line for it….but after 4 days of feeling sick flu like feelings as the days continue and a month went by I started to notice more and more changes.

I felt energy not a ton but some. I felt like I wanted to do more. In could sit up for longer periods of time without triggering my symptoms. Instead of 5 minutes I could sit up for 10 minutes. One day I realized I could leave my walker in a room and just walk around the house without holding on to things to keep my balance. My mom, dog, and I started walking outside. These changes started slow and there was definitely a part of me that was afraid to believe because if I did believe and say the words “I am on the road to recovery,’ what if something changed and I was but to being very very sick again stagnant in my life.

Now fast-forward to now November of 2021. I have been walking without my walker for over 4 months now. I have a niece my first one and I’m an auntie. I can hold the baby and walk around. I can get down on the floor and lay her on her mat. I can babysit and go for walks in the hills of the city with my sister, mom, and baby. This has been such a wonderful light in my life. The constant baby smiles we see her once a week and facetime a lot with the baby.

I have a boyfriend. He’s amazing. the most caring, funny, and honestly the most genuine guy. I have been able to go out on dates. Like actually leave my house get dressed up and go out. This is such a huge thing for me, I was actually nervous that no one would want to try to date me with all the things that come along with it but this guy sure is one of a kind.

There is a lot of benefits of the stages of recovery I am in now. As I’m sure you can tell my mood is even happier. But there will ups and downs and rest days and really tired days and not feeling good days but the good thing is after I rest it doesn’t seem to last like before. YAY!!!!!!

Beauty/Lifestyle Blogger

Emotions

Teresa Love

I think it’s interesting how much your emotions can change from one second to the next. At one moment you’re feeling okay and content and the next you can feel so distraught or sad and you don’t know why.

I understand it is my depression but I still feel like it’s such an abnormal feeling in my body. I’m the girl who is smiling because she’s happy. The girl who cheers other people up. But now I’m the girl whose sad. I’m the girl whose tired of feeling sick all the time. Who has all these emotions and she’s writing because she doesn’t know how to get them out.

I’ve always pulled my strength from God. I was doing a Bible study the other day with my mom and there was a part that said “ Happiness is dependent on what happens – our circumstances. Joy is far deeper and is not so dependent on our outward circumstances. It is a blessing from God. Joy is the characteristic of an encounter with Jesus.” I feel like this really speaks to how I feel. Even if I feel emotionally sad it doesn’t mean I have lost the JOY and HOPE we can find in Jesus.

Love, T

Health Journey

Can You Trust?

Teresa Love

I came across a post on Instagram of a fellow Spoonie today. She was showing her painting that she has been working on, it made me smile.

When I was first diagnosed with CFS/ME the doctor told me that it happens to woman between the age of 20 and 30, perfectionists, driven, and creative.

Well that’s me…

When I first heard that it honestly freaked me out like “should I have not pushed myself so hard?” “Could I have changed my path?” “And why did this happen to me?”

Growing up we are told to “do our best, try hardest, and never settle for mediocrity.” I always heard these phrases growing up and thought “yes I can do this, I may not be the smartest in school but I will always work my butt off “Could this be why I am sick?” All this pushing and striving for perfection?”

These thoughts go through my mind more often than not I would haven to admit. But I need to remember is they are just thoughts and it only matters what I do NEXT. Do I let these thoughts control my mind and body and let it control how I feel emotionally?

I don’t believe any of this! I know there is a big, huge, unbelievable plan for me. God is always here. Even in my darkest moments God is there hugging me.

In the world we always want to find the reason WHY. Why did your friend get sick? Where does cancer come from? Why does this happen to people? What will happen after we die, like I know Heaven but what Is it really like? Why is there violence and hate in this world? The truth is the ONLY one who know is God. He knows every single plan, moment, and person.

All we can do is trust in the Lord with all of our hearts. And I know that’s is to say and hard to do but I have learned through thick and thin, through negative and positive moments, through losing friends and making new ones God is ALWAYS there. And we need to trust in HIM wholeheartedly. Not for just this second, but every single second after that and with EVERYTHING.

So I ask you? Can you trust God wholeheartedly?

christian

My Faith Binder

Teresa Love

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On Pinterest I have seen a lot of versions of the Prayer Binder or War Binder or what I want to call it a Faith Binder.

My Faith binder is this journal that lets me feel organized while growing closer to God. When we go through life and feel lost dealing with everything, for me to be anchored in Christ makes a huge difference. To have that constant relationship going with God through prayer, reading His word, and allowing God to take control. This gives me a peace beyond understanding or circumstance. I wanted to have something that was all in one place my notes, my gratitude, prayers, requests, verses, and goals. And it’s super easy to make!

Binder – 4 x 7 inches

Inserts- Cardstock paper cut to size and 6 whole punched.

Dividers – Blessings, Verses, Notes, Prayers, requests, and Goals. You could also base it more on prayer have dividers for spouse, kids, parents, church, etc…

Pens – gel pens, sharpie fine tip, paper mate colored pens.

Step 1: buy binder take out any paper you don’t need.

Step 2: find cardstock you want to use print or solid.

Step 3: cut card stock into 4×7 or less and punch wholes using 6 whole punch.

Step 4: according to color choose dividers and names.

Step 5: place dividers in Binder with paper.

DONE!

I used colored paper “gives it a little something don’t you think?” – legally blonde